258. Renewal Without the Hustle: How to Let Growth Happen This Season
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[00:00:05] Henry: Hello, I'm Henry Emmons and welcome back to Joy Lab.
[00:00:09] Aimee Prasek: And I am Aimee Prasek. Welcome to our month of renewal. So this is kind of new for us, uh, a new calendar of sorts for our Joy Lab adventure together. So three times a year in April, August and December, we will pause new content and also take a thoughtful pause to honor our natural rhythms, to connect with the seasonal shifts that are happening that impact us, to go into those seasonal shifts in ways that really nourish us instead of fighting them. These months will be, you know, just like in many ways our, our Elements of Joy. We may be doing less, like less from a checking off to-do list kind of sense, but the impact is just as powerful.
[00:01:05] Henry: Yeah. So, I've mentioned before that. I, I did some training and then did some work for several years using a model of inner work that really was drawn from Parker Palmer, so author, speaker, and one of my favorite human beings. And one of the things that just kind of got woven into my bones through that is this idea of, of taking lessons and using the metaphors from nature, particularly around the seasons. And so, you know, thinking about how the, the, what the season of the year has to teach us as human beings because we are after all part of nature and I think. What we wanna do is to try to become even more a part of nature.
When I think about what, what are the real roots of resilience—really living a resilient life—one of them that I think is really powerful that we don't give quite enough effort or attention to is aligning with nature. And in, in this case, I'm really thinking about the, the rhythms of nature, you know, it's what it's showing us about how to live with a sense of rhythm.
So there's the night and day rhythms, you know, which are pretty obvious. They're shorter rhythms within the course of a day. But then of course there's, there's seasonal and, you know, seasons of the year and seasons of our life. And so right now we want to think a little bit about spring and what spring is there to teach and, and show us.
So living where we do, in the northern part of the central, northern part of the country, winter just has an unmistakable impact on us. There's simply no getting away from it. And it is a time when our bodies physically, and I think our spirits as well are just drawn inward.
It's a time where we're almost forced to slow down in a way.
[00:03:24] Aimee Prasek: Mm-hmm.
[00:03:25] Henry: Spring is different. Spring is a time of renewed activity. It's, you know, a time when nature comes back to life and a lot of us are feeling that as well. Much needed, returning to life. But there's also this, this element that we don't want to miss of an alternation almost between activity and rest. Activity and rest. And sometimes we can lose sight of that in the spring and maybe the summer too. Again, living in Minnesota, we try to pack it all in in just a very few months, you know, and, and we end up feeling even more depleted sometimes, as a result of it. So we really wanna, kind of bring forth and highlight this, this need that we all have, that our bodies have our minds, our souls for, for a period of activity to be followed by a period of rest and integration. So I think we wanna embrace that, move into it and honor it in a deeper way.
[00:04:36] Aimee Prasek: Yeah, I just, I, I get stuck on the like play hard, work hard mentality. I could maybe go with that if rest hard was in there too. Like play hard, work hard, rest hard.
[00:04:48] Henry: It's a bit of an oxymoron, isn't it? Rest hard.
[00:04:52] Aimee Prasek: Yeah man. So we're gonna, we're, yeah, we're gonna renewal in, a, a less maybe abrasive, demanding sort of way. But there's, I, I love that you're, reminding us, Henry, of those, these, these active and rest cycles. So yeah, this month we're focusing on renewal. Renewal is about expansion, transformation; but not from all of this stuff that you like take in from outside of you.
It's about what wants to grow in you and giving that space for it to take root. I actually, I just planted some seeds this weekend. This is what happens when it gets warm in Minnesota. That first warm day, I was like, I am going to the Garden Store. So I immediately went to the garden store to start some indoor seed planting.
[00:05:43] Henry: You are, you are more of an optimist than you let
[00:05:46] Aimee Prasek: I know. I do that, I put my boots away too, and then sure enough, there's a blizzard and I have no shoes.
[00:05:53] Henry: A foot and a half of snow.
[00:05:55] Aimee Prasek: But I have like 300 plants growing.
I have optimistic streaks for sure. But I love, I love planting those little seeds, those little tiny seeds, 'cause you know, I put it into a pot and with some time, with some water, some sun, some soil, it sprouts. It has so much within it, that little seed, everything it needs to initiate that change. Mighty oaks from little acorns grow, I think is the saying. And I think it's true for us too. which is really counterculture. So much of what we see, what we're trained to do in our "always-on" culture works against renewal. It's so easy to get way too busy consuming content or trying to stuff your schedule full of things, racing through to-do lists, shuttling kids to all kinds of extra activities, overworking over performing, just trying to keep up with this pace that we think we should be living at, and it makes it really hard,
I think to allow for something new to grow, something from within us. That good, that is within us, our resilient, joyful, authentic nature. That mighty oak within us that wants to arise.
[00:07:16] Henry: So Aimee, once you have put those seeds in the little bit of soil and I guess you give them some water, but then, I mean, does it take a a lot of effort on your part to, to get 'em going, get 'em to sprout, and
[00:07:31] Aimee Prasek: I just spritz them and give them words of encouragement and love, and sure enough, they grow.
[00:07:39] Henry: You just gotta be sure you don't put 'em out too soon. Right?
[00:07:42] Aimee Prasek: Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's pretty simple. It's kind of amazing, right?
[00:07:45] Henry: Yeah. Yeah. Well, you know, you know this Aimee, 'cause I say it a lot. One of my favorite quotes is, a line from a little haiku poem. "Spring comes and the grass grows by itself."
[00:08:03] Aimee Prasek: I knew that was gonna come out today.
[00:08:06] Henry: I was trying to, I, I'm gonna change it a little. "Spring comes and Aimee's little seeds grow by themselves."
Almost.
[00:08:14] Aimee Prasek: Yeah, almost. Yeah.
[00:08:16] Henry: So one of the things I love about that, what I wanna highlight is that it's, it's, it's telling us in a not so subtle way that this happens effortlessly. That it's not through our diligence and effort and, you know, eleven self-help projects or books or what have you. It's allowed to happen. It's just there and it's allowed to come up because we don't get in the way of it.
[00:08:55] Aimee Prasek: Hmm.
[00:08:56] Henry: And so I think that's the, the kind of, uh, focus we wanna have for this month. Let's not think about putting forth so much effort. Let's allow whatever is there to emerge, to emerge. Let's just allow it to come forth and, and see what happens.
You know, give it maybe a little bit of attention, a little, little watering or a little light, or, you know, simply turn to it from time to time, but, but not through effort. And see where we go with this.
[00:09:34] Aimee Prasek: Yeah So this month we're inviting you to create that space for renewal.
And you can do that in whatever way feels right to you because you do know what you need. Better than we could know for you. With that said, though, we will give you three options that you can choose from, or you could let them inspire something else for you that's unique. So the first option is to renew by going deeper with some of your past practices, likely if you're in the Joy Lab Program, you'll now see all of your past Experiments in your library available for you. You can return to one of the Elements we've already explored, one you missed maybe, or one that sparked something in you. And then you can revisit those experiments with fresh eyes,
notice what's different this time. maybe notice what's ready to grow. If you're not in the program, we'll have some curated episodes this month focused on renewal. So these will be a mix of past episodes focusing on hopefulness, episodes about transformation, authentic growth. lots of good stuff.
So you can listen and then check the show notes for more resources if you'd like. The point is, as Henry said, is to tend to what wants to grow, what needs, just a little bit of spritz, a little bit of sun, little bit of warmth, rather than just chasing something new again and again and trying to force something.
[00:11:07] Henry: Yeah. Yeah. I think spring especially, at least this time of year, is, it, it's easy to get caught up in this desire to improve ourselves or, clean things out and, do a, a makeover, you know, and all of this, this kind of mentality. It's kind of driven by our, well, our culture of doing, like you're referring to.
And I, I just, I think we wanna just really provide an invitation to do it differently to, to maybe observe that, but then let that kind of stuff go. So another option for how to approach this month is to, to just view it as an opportunity to integrate what you already know or what you have already done.
So this is, going with the notion that what you need, you already have within you. And you don't need to add anymore. So in a sense, it's, it's addition by subtraction, maybe even taking a few things off your plate, particularly things related to personal growth or bettering yourself or, or any of those things that are constantly kind of calling to us.
So it's making room. It is opening up and making room by not consuming quite so much of, with your mind, not taking in quite so much information or others' opinions or maybe even the news. You know, it's the news right now is awfully what shall we say Compelling.
and, hard to, hard to turn our attention away from.
And, you know, it just draws us in and then of course has all kinds of impacts on us. And so I'm not advocating we put our heads in the sand, but I think, you know, just considering a little bit of a information diet, so to speak, take, take a little of that off your plate as well. You could also do some really practical things, with regards to information such as, change the settings of your phone so you're not getting notifications all of the time, or at least make 'em silent so they're not taking your attention away from something else that you're doing.
You could decide to put some active limits on your screen time, how much, especially your phone, you know, that addictive little device we've talked about before. And if you have kids still at home or in your life, consider really, encouraging them to limit their screen time or cut out some of their overscheduled activities.
But again, it's about creating space. You don't have to do this in a severe way. Just think about doing it in a way that opens up a little bit of your time and energy and, and psychic space. Once you do that, if you can just allow your mind to settle a little bit just to calm on its own, then you can turn your attention to whatever is drawing you internally and decide what you want to give more time and energy to.
But you, you can do it because you're choosing it and not because someone else is putting it in front of you or, you know, making you think that this is the answer. And you've gotta do this. You can just choose wisely on your own behalf what really calls on you, if anything. Otherwise, you can just step back and enjoy the spring.
Nature's giving us all kinds of opportunities for just pure pleasure right now too.
[00:15:07] Aimee Prasek: Yes, perfect transition into our third option, Henry, which is rest. Renewal through rest. Give yourself permission to just thaw out. There's that time in spring where the ground just needs to soak in some warmth, some sun, some nourishment to support another season of growth, we need to do that too.
So building off your suggestions, Henry, to create more space for that. Agreed. The quickest way to do that is to take a break from all the content if that's coming at you, 24 7. So a digital detox, an information diet, as Henry said, go offline for as long as you can each day, more and more each day.
You don't have to cut it out completely, but just decreasing bit by bit. Pick those easy things that you can take off your phone or not look at, or place your phone somewhere else. Where it's out of arm's reach. The research actually is just getting so clear here. Like even just having your phone nearby impairs your cognitive functioning.
We just can't focus on what we wanna focus on when that little device is an arm's reach away, always tempting us with something; an an alert, a notification, a possible email you've been waiting for. It's just. It's too much. I'm thinking of Mary Oliver's wisdom, from one of her poems. She writes, "listen, are you breathing Just a little and calling it a life?"
I love that.
[00:16:41] Henry: Hmm.
[00:16:42] Aimee Prasek: That to me, is just an invitation, a plea to, to rest and take a full breath. So how can you, how can you, gather a full, a full breath? You can, you know, once you get that space. Once you take a break from that device, identify what nourishes you best and explore different activities this month.
Take a nap or a bath. Watch the birds. Meet a friend for coffee if that feels like rest for you, play a game with your kid. Clean up the garden once the pollinators have left, read a book. Cook a new recipe, journal, play basketball in the park. Take a walk. Rollerblade. I'm gonna rollerblade, I haven't rollerbladed in like 15 years.
That is my goal for April. I'm just gonna rollerblade around town. So if you see me know that I'm resting on my roller blades,
[00:17:42] Henry: Aimee, I might, I might join you for that. I've got some old rollerblades. I think I still got 'em. And, I haven't probably done it for 25 years, but I'd be game. I I will be, well protected.
[00:17:57] Aimee Prasek: I was just gonna say, let's get some
helmets, maybe some wrist guards.
[00:18:02] Henry: Yeah.
[00:18:03] Aimee Prasek: Yeah. So it could be a little bit more adventuresome like that. And so, restful, playful, if, you know, those are the types of words I think that, might draw you in. So, nourish in a way that, that suits you during the season.
[00:18:19] Henry: Yeah.
[00:18:20] Aimee Prasek: And, and to Henry's point, I think you noted maybe that's non-doing.
Sometimes the most renewing thing you can do is nothing to simply just be still for a little bit more this month and let something new emerge in its own time.
[00:18:34] Henry: Yeah. Yeah. Really doing nothing is, is not a, a bad, word here. It's, it's a really legitimate, potentially really life-giving way to approach this.
[00:18:48] Aimee Prasek: So let me just outline what the month will look like. We will release one renewal focus episode from our Joy Lab Library every Wednesday this month. So again, past episodes that will help you create space, and let that growth arise.
If you're a member, you have access to all Experiments. So if you wanna go deeper, choose from those Experiments. If you're integrating something as Henry discussed in that second option, something you've been wanting to work on, feel free to pop into past episodes, or Experiments to support you there, then pop back out and tend to what you're growing. If you choose to rest completely we'll see you next month. Yeah, May 1st we'll be back with new content, so choose your option this month. Go deeper, integrate, rest, all of these create renewal, or create your own path of renewal. Trust your wisdom. So, to close our time today and inspire our month of renewal, I wanna share some wisdom from Wayne Mueller.
Here's what he wrote: "In the relentless busyness of modern life, we have lost the rhythm between work and rest."
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